ugh, just feel like an awful AP parent today :(

Ugh, I feel like the worst mother in the world today. Things are stressful at home, DH has been out of work since Halloween and no prospects of a new job, not an interview even. I've been run down and haven't been able to keep up my weight lifting routine and high protein diet - got sick with bronchitis for 2 weeks then lost the motivation after that. Without that, I get drained while nursing and lose weight, even though DD is 2 yr. old now (she still nurses quite a lot for 2, it feels like). I weigh around 100 lb. now (I am 5'4" tall so that is quite underweight). I always feel blah when my weight falls below 105 lb. (Yes, the old ED voices are happy about this, but I'm not going to give into them.  I put the scale away today because it's causing those feelings of worth attached to a number to come crawling back.)  Logically, I know this is not good, but I'll gain the weight back; I got down this low right around Tessa's first birthday, and that's when I started the weight lifting/high protein routine, and that got my weight up to around 108 lb. or so.  So I HAVE to start lifting weights seriously AND eating more protein (whey protein shakes again after working out...sigh...I could think of a million tastier things to eat but those are just the most convenient).

This afternoon, I just snapped with Tessa (25 months & extremely high needs). She would not nap even though she clearly needed it, she just fought and fought and fought, started doing things like scratching at me, pulling my hair, twiddling with the boobies. I was getting madder & madder & talking to her in sterner tones (I didn't yell but it still made me feel cruel) because I just needed a break. Finally, I told Tessa if she didn't behave, I'd leave her in the room and she'd have to fall asleep on her own (we have never even attempted CIO with her but I needed to leave before I started screaming at her and calm down). I left and shut the door and stayed out 5 minutes while she screamed and screamed, but then I couldn't take it any more (felt awful & guilty) and went back in to her, but she didn't sleep. I just put on a Baby Einstein video and started folding laundry and gave up on the nap, and by some miracle, she's watching it and reading books (probably because she needs to have a poopy diaper--she NEVER and I mean NEVER EVER plays alone by herself unless she's working on a poopy). It gets tiresome, playing Little People for hours on end or jumping from one thing to another because her attention span gets shorter & shorter the more sleepy she gets. But then, it doesn't seem right to give in to DD's stubbornness and demands and it seems inconsistent if I want her to nap and then cave in to her.

I've had a rough day, not helped by the fact that I'm so sore from lifting weights yesterday (first time I've done a serious weight lifting routine in about a month).  I overdid it obviously, and my body is protesting, especially my behind!

Feb. 4 Giveaways

GUMMY LUMP TOYS GIVEAWAY
Melissa & Doug Unit Blocks Giveaway
Win a 60 piece set of Unit Blocks by Melissa & Doug from Gummy Lump Toys {ARV $47.99} Giveaway at Gummy Lump Toys Ends 2/18 

LESLIE LOVES VEGGIES GIVEAWAYS
Popcorn Palace Giveaway
Win a "Create Your Own Tin" from Popcorn Palace {family size, choose up to 3 flavors} {ARV $54.95} Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 2/21

Misikko Hana Elite 1" Ceramic Flat Iron Giveaway
Win a Hana Elite 1" Ceramic Flat Iron from Misikko {ARV $230} Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 2/22 

NEW AGE MAMA GIVEAWAYS
Chocomize Giveaway
Win a $25 Gift Certificate to Chocomize  to create your own Custom Chocolate Bar Giveaway at New Age Mama Ends 2/12


Community Coffee Valentine's Day Giveaway
Win a Community Coffee Valentine's Day Gift Basket  Giveaway at New Age Mama Ends 2/23 

THE REVIEW BROADS GIVEAWAYS
In the Midst of It All by Tiffany Warren Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book In the Midst of It All by Tiffany Warren - 5 Winners Giveaway at The Review Broads Ends 2/18 

SIMPLY STACIE GIVEAWAYS
The Adult Toy Shoppe Giveaway
Win a Kama Sutra Oil of Love in Cherry Almond and a 52 Weeks of Romance Kit from The Adult Toy Shoppe Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/11


Avon Lipstick Giveaway
Win an Ultra Color Rich Mega Impact Lipstick from Avon - 5 Winners Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/11

Chileandreamer Necklace Giveaway
Win a Fleur de Coeur Necklace from Chileandreamer Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/11


Upper Canada Soap Body Truffles Giveaway
Win a Body Truffles Sinfully Sweet Bubble Bath in Chocolate Strawberry  Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/11


SWEEPS4BLOGGERS GIVEAWAYS
Girlfriends Are Lifesavers by Reeda Joseph Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Girlfriends Are Lifesavers by Reeda Joseph {ARV $14.95} - 5 Winners Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 2/12   

Feb. 3 Giveaways

THE ADVENTURES OF PAUL & NATALIE GIVEAWAYS
Country Bob's Sauce Giveaway
Win a Bottle of Country Bob's All Purpose Sauce - 2 Winners Giveaway at The Adventures of Paul & Natalie Ends 2/16


Charm Factory Heart Bracelet Giveaway
Win a Heart Bracelet of your choice from Charm Factory {ARV $24.99} Giveaway at The Adventures of Paul & Natalie Ends 2/20


LESLIE LOVES VEGGIES GIVEAWAYS
Q. Bel All-Natural Chocolate Bars Giveaway
Win a Box of Variety Chocolate Bars (20 Bars) from Q. Bel - 2 Winners Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 2/17


Rubbermaid Drawer Organizer Set
Win a 6 Piece, Interlocking Drawer Organizer Set from Rubbermaid Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 2/17  


THE POST-IT PLACE GIVEAWAYS
Crescent Creations Giveaway
Win a Pillsbury Crescent Gift Pack that includes 2 coupons for FREE Pillsbury Crescent Rolls & 3 Serving Trays Giveaway at The Post-It Place  Ends 2/10

Chocolate Cheerios Giveaway
Win a Chocolate Cheerios Gift Pack that includes a Box of Chocolate Cheerios, a Chocolate Scented Spa Kit & a Chocolate-Colored Ceramic Cereal Bowl Giveaway at The Post-It Place Ends 2/12 

SIMPLY STACIE GIVEAWAYS
Chocomize Giveaway
Win a $25 Gift Certificate to Chocomize to design your own Custom Chocolate Bar Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/10


Meridane Design Giveaway
Win a Silver Standard Necklace or Bracelet from Meridane Designs Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/10

Mineral Basics Giveaway
Win a Natural Mineral Lip Gloss in Winner's Choice of Color from Mineral Basics Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/10  

Scentsy Giveaway
Win a Scentsy System (One full-sized Warmer & 3 Scent Bars) Giveaway at Simply Stacie  Ends 2/10


Wholesale Keychain Heart Keychain Giveaway
Win a Heart Keychain of your choice (5 styles to choose from) from Wholesale Keychain Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/10


Husbands May Come and Go but Friends Are Forever by Judith Marshall Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Husbands May Come and Go but Friends Are Forever by Judith Marshall Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/12

I Am Ozzy Audiobook Giveaway
Win a copy of the Audiobook I Am Ozzy by Ozzy Osbourne with Chris Ayers, read by Frank Skinner - 3 Winners Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/17 

Feb. 2nd giveaways

LESLIE LOVES VEGGIES GIVEAWAYS
Get Financially Naked by Manisha Thakor & Sharon Kedar Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Get Financially Naked:  How to Talk Money with Your Honey by Manisha Thakor & Sharon Kedar {ARV $12.95} - 2 Winners Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies  Ends 2/15


Ecogear Messenger Bag  Giveaway
Win a COHO Lifestyle Messenger Bag from Ecogear {ARV $24.99} Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 2/16

THE REVIEW BROADS GIVEAWAYS
The Wife's Tale by Lori Lansens Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book The Wife's Tale by Lori Lansens - 5 Winners Giveaway at The Review Broads Ends 2/17 

SIMPLY STACIE GIVEAWAYS
Bisou Bisou Beads Giveaway
Win a Valentine's Day Scrabble Pendant from Bisou Bisou Beads - 3 Winners Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/9


j. Nic Designs Earring Giveaway
Win a pair of Kaleidoscope Earrings in Garnet made of oxidized and hammered Sterling Silver Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/12

Bird in Flight Boutique Earring Giveaway
Win a pair of Bird in Flight Earrings from the Bird in Flight Boutique Giveaway at Simply Stacie  Ends 2/13

Air Bud: Golden Receiver DVD Giveaway
Win a copy of the DVD Air Bud: Golden Receiver Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/16  

SWEEPS4BLOGGERS GIVEAWAYS
Black Socks Men's Sock Giveaway
Win 3 Pair of Men's Calf Socks from Black Socks {ARV $29}Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers  Ends 2/11

The Serotonin Power Diet Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book The Serotonin Power Diet by Judith Wurtzman PhD and Nina Frusztager MD {ARV $15.99} Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers  Ends 2/11 

Tropical Traditions Deodorant Giveaway
Win a Deodorant 3 Pack from Tropical Traditions.  Scents included are Frankincense, Classic and Lavendar {ARV $41.85, currently on sale for $21} Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers  Ends 2/11 

Feb. 1st giveaways!

THE ADVENTURES OF PAUL & NATALIE GIVEAWAYS
Hasbro Games Giveaway
Win the Monopoly Championship Edition Game from Hasbro {ARV $19.99} Giveaway at The Adventures of Paul & Natalie Ends 2/15


LESLIE LOVES VEGGIES GIVEAWAYS
Toxic Friends by Susan Shapiro Barash Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Toxic Friends by Susan Shapiro Barash {ARV $24.99} - 2 Winners Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 2/15


FudgeLuscious Giveaway
Win 8 Luv Cups of FudgeLuscious Fudge (choice of flavors) {ARV $16.99} Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 2/16

SECOND TIME AROUND GIVEAWAYS
Fairytale Brownies Giveaway
Win A Valentine's Day Dozen Brownies from Fairytale Brownies  {ARV $33.90}Giveaway at Second Time Around  Ends 2/15 

Hasbro Games Giveaway
Win 2 Hasbro Games - Pictureeka & Monopology Deal Giveaway at Second Time Around Ends 2/15

SHE SCRIBES GIVEAWAYS
Macy's Go Red for Women's Heart Health $25 Gift Card Giveaway
Macy's is a proud sponsor of the Go Red Campaign for Women's Heart Health.  They would like to help you purchase a Little Red Dress to increase awareness of Women's Heart Health or another item at Macy's by giving away a $25 Gift Card Giveaway at She Scribes Ends 2/5 

SIMPLY STACIE GIVEAWAYS
Send Out Cards Giveaway
Win a free Card of your Choice to send a Valentine to someone special! Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/2


$50 Visa Gift Card Giveaway
Win a $50 Visa Gift Card from Simply Stacie Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/8


Jovan Satisfaction Perfume Giveaway
Win a 0.5 oz. Bottle of Jovan Satisfaction Perfume for Women and a 0.5 oz. Bottle of Jovan Satisfaction for Men {ARV $24} Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/8

Pyrography M Jewelry Giveaway
Win a Garnet Necklace & Earrings Set from Pyrography M Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/10   

Tracie Nicole Designs Jewelry Giveaway
Win a Fine Silver 4 of Hearts Necklace from Tracie Nicole Designs Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/11 

SWEEPS4BLOGGERS GIVEAWAYS
The Village Company Baby Elmo Bath Set Giveaway
Win the new Baby Elmo Product Line - Baby Shampoo, Baby Wash, Baby Bath & Baby Lotion - from The Village Company {ARV $25} Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers  Ends 2/9   

Cuddle Toes Fleece Giveaway
Win a Cuddle Toes Fleece {ARV $29.99} - 2 Winners Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 2/10  

Jovan Satisfaction for Men & Women Giveaway
Win a Jovan Satisfaction Perfume set - one bottle for Women and one for Men {ARV $24}Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 2/10  

1/31 Giveaways

A GAL NEEDS AT LEAST 2 BLOGS GIVEAWAYS
Cinnamon Lotion & Massage Oil Giveaway
Win Sun Valley Cinnamon Moisturizing Lotion & Sun Valley Cinnamon Massage Oil Giveaway at A Gal Needs at Least 2 Blogs  Ends 2/10

LESLIE LOVES VEGGIES GIVEAWAYS
Dr. Alkalitis Skin Care Giveaway
Win a full-sized jar of Organic Universal  Mask from Dr. Alkalitis {ARV $45} Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 2/14

MOMA LOVEBUG GIVEAWAYS
Blush Undershirts Giveaway
Win a Blush Undershirt of your choice Giveaway at Moma Lovebug  Ends 2/10

SAGE AND SAVVY GIVEAWAYS
Denise's Daily Dozen by Denise Austin Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Denise's Daily Dozen  by Denise Austin - 5 Winners Giveaway at Sage and Savvy Ends 1/31 

SIMPLY STACIE GIVEAWAYS
The Chimera Seed by Matthew Tully Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book The Chimera Seed by Matthew Tully Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/14 

Painted Turtle Wooden Toys Giveaway
Win the Baby's First Guitar & Stacking Inukshuk Toys from  Painted Turtle Wooden Toys Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/14

Three Cups by Mark St. Germain Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Three Cups by Mark St. Germain - 5 Winners  Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 2/14 

SWEEPS4BLOGGERS GIVEAWAYS
Click Espresso Protein Drink Giveaway
One will win a Grand Prize Package containing a 14-serving Click Canister and a Click Shaker {ARV $31.90} 25 will win a a Click Single Serve Sample Pack {ARV $2.95} - 26 Winners in All  Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 2/9


Where the Jobs Are Now by Joe Watson Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Where the Jobs Are Now by Joe Watson {ARV $18.95} Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 2/9   

Weekend Giveaways

MOMS FOCUS ON CYBER WORLD GIVEAWAYS
The Andean Collection Jewelry Giveaway
Win a huaryruro necklace from The Andean Collection  Giveaway at Moms Focus on Cyber World   Ends 2/8

SHE SCRIBES
Green Mountain Coffee Sampler Giveaway
Win a Fair Trade Organic Coffee Sampler from Green Mountain Coffee  that includes a 10 oz. bag of each Organic Ethiopian Yirgacheffe, Organic French Roast & Organic Sumatran Reserve Coffee Giveaway at She Scribes Ends 2/2

Whitney Houston:  The Deluxe 25th Anniversary CD Giveaway
Win a copy of Whitney Houston's Deluxe 25th Anniversary CD from ThinkTank Marketing - 3 Winners Giveaway at She Scribes  Ends 2/5 

SWEEPS4BLOGGERS GIVEAWAYS
Charlie's Soap ~ Laundry Products & More Giveaway
One will win a Grand Prize Package: Laundry Powder, Laundry Liquid, All Purpose Cleaner and a tote {ARV $50}. 5 will win a 5 wash sample of Laundry Powder - 6 Winners Total Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 2/8


Searching for Tina Turner by Jacqueline Luckett Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Searching for Tina Turner by Jacqueline Luckett {ARV $24.99} - 5 Winners Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 2/8

VaVaVroom Women's Tee Giveaway
Win a Women's Total Moto Tee (choice of size S-2XL) {ARV $17.99} Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 2/8