Wednesday, March 10, 2010

my sister visited today and I fell apart :(

My sister stopped by after work to visit today, and I just lost it.  She quit her job a couple weeks ago because she didn't like the way things were managed at her job, and she already has a new job.  I know her line of work is different from hubby's (she's a physical therapist), but it just does not seem fair that we always get the short end of the stick.  She started talking about her new job, and I just snapped and the next thing I knew, I was in tears and it took forever to compose myself again.  Ugh.  Kelley has been looking for over 5 months now and not one callback or phone interview even.  I'm very depressed and anxious lately.  I'm having a lot of panic attacks, and lately the nerve pain/myofascial pain/fibromyalgia, what ever it is, has been BAD.  It does tend to flare up with stress, and I've had a lot of it lately.  I'm not going to harm myself or anything, but I just feel broken and beaten and can't take much more.

We're going to try to sell the house, which sickens me.  I think we're going to get Tessa & me packed fairly soon and make a trip out to LA and drop us off with the inlaws and Kelley will come back here and pack and tie up all the loose ends.  I am seriously at the end of my tether.  I know we have a lot to be grateful for - a thriving, smart daughter, our health (such as it is, it could always be worse), but these are dark days for me and hard to see the light.  I am numb inside and just want to be happy again and sleep well and not have at least 1 panic attack every day or constantly feel on the verge of a panic attack.  I am having a hard time keeping it together for Tessa. 

I know these tough days make us stronger in the end, but I sure hate going through them in the meantime.

Mar. 10 Giveaways

LESLIE LOVES VEGGIES GIVEAWAYS
HuePhoria Salt 'n Peppa's Giveaway
Win a Salt 'n Peppa's set of your choice from HuePhoria {ARV $12} Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 3/25 

Hershey's Extra Dark Chocolate Giveaway
Win a Prize Package from Hershey's that includes: bar/pouch combo of Hershey's Extra Dark Pure Dark Chocolate (flavors will vary based on availability), 1 box Hershey's Special Dark Dark Chocolate Bars (36 bars in each box), 1 bag Hershey's Nuggets Dark Chocolate with Almonds {ARV ~$40} - 2 Winners Giveaway at Leslie Loves Veggies Ends 3/25

NEW AGE MAMA GIVEAWAYS
Kootenay Bath Products Giveaway
Win an "Everything Bag" from Kootenay Bath Products that includes: Bath Melt in Lavender, 2 Bath Salts in Lavender and Oatmeal & Milk and Honey & Lollipop Roller Coaster Shower Gel Giveaway at New Age Mama Ends 3/29 

SIMPLY STACIE GIVEAWAYS
Earth Baby Organics Giveaway
Win 2 Items of Your Choice {up to $45} from the Earth Baby Organics website Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 3/16

Glamourmom Nursing Top or Tank Giveaway
Win a Regular Length Nursing Top or Tank in Your Choice of Size & Color Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 3/16


To Sin with a Scoundrel by Cara Elliot Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book To Sin with a Scoundrel by Cara Elliot - 5 Winners Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 3/23


Waking Up in the Land of Glitter by Kathy Cano-Murillo Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Waking Up in the Land of Glitter by Kathy Cano-Murillo - 3 Winners Giveaway at Simply Stacie Ends 3/24

SWEEPS4BLOGGERS GIVEAWAYS
Waking Up in the Land of Glitter by Kathy Cano-Murillo Book Giveaway
Win a copy of the book Waking Up in the Land of Glitter by Kathy Cano-Murillo {ARV $13.99} - 5 Winners Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 3/28   

Organic Bug CobraHead Weeder & Cultivator Giveaway
Win a CobraHead Short-Handled Weeder/Cultivator from Organic Bug {ARV $25}Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers  Ends 3/29  

Skinny Water Giveaway
Win a Mixed Case of Skinny Water {ARV $10} - 3 Winners Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 3/29

Strappy's Decorative Bra Strap Jewelry Giveaway
Win Decorative Bra Strap Jewelry in Rhinestone, Gold-Beaded or Trendy Circles {ARV $22-$25} - 3 Winners Giveaway at Sweeps4Bloggers Ends 3/29